Ever think you have it all together and realize that you have left God out of the equation!! That’s me!!
God is good though and opened my eyes to my lack of dependence on Him yesterday and showed me my PRIDEFUL attitude. In my Bible Study “Having a Mary Spirit” it says “A prideful attitude is really mutiny against our Maker because it assumes we’re the ones in charge of the universe. Certain we’re right. Determined to have our way. Stubbornly refusing to bend or bow to anyone, including God.” Ouch!! And so how I behaved the last 2 days!!
It started with a major melt down when I came to the hospital Monday night and broke down, blew up and got self righteous over the condition Pepe was left in. The details aren’t as important as the fact I felt I had to “save the day”. Yesterday, I was at the 2 Oasis @ Swaziland CarePoints. I saw problems arise both logistical and relational and I tried to problem solve and come up with practical solutions. When I was back at the hospital last night I did not trust that the nurses were doing their job adequately and called the doctor to come check Pepe out because she seemed more lethargic and seeming to me (the expert) to be regressing.
God called me on all of it last night. "What did you bring to me in all of this? I should have been the first one you brought all of this too." He pointed out that I cannot fix any of this. I am not in control, He is. He is sovereign and He does not need to rely on the nurses or Sandra’s practical problem solving skills to accomplish anything. He told me hands off until He leads me otherwise. Litterally, I was to stay in bed and not “jump to Pepe’s rescue” unless she called out to me. And you know what, she didn’t. God gave me a physical example of how much I want to be in control and not sit back and wait, expecially on Him. Forgive me for my arrogance. Pray that I can be obedient to God but more importantly put Him back in the center of my daily life.
God is good though and opened my eyes to my lack of dependence on Him yesterday and showed me my PRIDEFUL attitude. In my Bible Study “Having a Mary Spirit” it says “A prideful attitude is really mutiny against our Maker because it assumes we’re the ones in charge of the universe. Certain we’re right. Determined to have our way. Stubbornly refusing to bend or bow to anyone, including God.” Ouch!! And so how I behaved the last 2 days!!
It started with a major melt down when I came to the hospital Monday night and broke down, blew up and got self righteous over the condition Pepe was left in. The details aren’t as important as the fact I felt I had to “save the day”. Yesterday, I was at the 2 Oasis @ Swaziland CarePoints. I saw problems arise both logistical and relational and I tried to problem solve and come up with practical solutions. When I was back at the hospital last night I did not trust that the nurses were doing their job adequately and called the doctor to come check Pepe out because she seemed more lethargic and seeming to me (the expert) to be regressing.
God called me on all of it last night. "What did you bring to me in all of this? I should have been the first one you brought all of this too." He pointed out that I cannot fix any of this. I am not in control, He is. He is sovereign and He does not need to rely on the nurses or Sandra’s practical problem solving skills to accomplish anything. He told me hands off until He leads me otherwise. Litterally, I was to stay in bed and not “jump to Pepe’s rescue” unless she called out to me. And you know what, she didn’t. God gave me a physical example of how much I want to be in control and not sit back and wait, expecially on Him. Forgive me for my arrogance. Pray that I can be obedient to God but more importantly put Him back in the center of my daily life.
Even though it sounds such "noble" as struggle in "Africa", it is the same ones I had in the US and probabably you struggle with every day. How little we let God in on even the little problems we face every day, when He is so much better at handling them.
My prayer in my “Battlefield of the Mind” Devotional today was. “Wise and wonderful God, sometimes things don’t make sense to me, but nevertheless, I want to be in Your will. Help me develop opportunity to serve You. Teach me to trust You more, and help me to obey You quickly instead of trying to reason things out.” (I so try to reason everything out!) I Corinthians 2:12 says “And God has actually given us His Spirit (not the world’s spirit) so we can know the wonderful things God has freely given us.”
I’m so glad as my “Having a Mary Spirit” states: “Correction is not rejection. And “rebuke is always a gift to our souls.” Thank you for the gift to my soul last night.
My prayer in my “Battlefield of the Mind” Devotional today was. “Wise and wonderful God, sometimes things don’t make sense to me, but nevertheless, I want to be in Your will. Help me develop opportunity to serve You. Teach me to trust You more, and help me to obey You quickly instead of trying to reason things out.” (I so try to reason everything out!) I Corinthians 2:12 says “And God has actually given us His Spirit (not the world’s spirit) so we can know the wonderful things God has freely given us.”
I’m so glad as my “Having a Mary Spirit” states: “Correction is not rejection. And “rebuke is always a gift to our souls.” Thank you for the gift to my soul last night.
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